things could be different...

why do they insist on making things in their life this difficult? don't they realize that things could be better. should be better. better for them.. and better for me.. better for us. HOME is supposed to be a place of safety, a place of refuge and love. i'm not supposed to feel like i need to escape to other places to get away from home. oh how i wish they were happier. i wish WE as a family were happier. I wish they just realized things dont have to be this tough.

The spirit testifies to me all that is true

The missionaries that taught me had such strong testimonies it was like fire in my bones...i felt the power of what they were saying and the truth. It all bore witness to my spirit. For them i am forever grateful. I've found my home. ♥

The spirit that has been felt tonight was... beyond words to even explain. I'm truly happy. I wouldn't change a thing in my life. I trust in heavenly father with every bone in my body and with every breath i take. With every decision i have to make he is involved every step of the way.

simple things

I am grateful for a lot of things but two very simple little things i am absolutely grateful for... and instantly make me happy would be the rain and the stars. I guess they're are not so little but things that are not appreciated by a lot of people. But i certainly appreciate and give thanks to my Savior for these two earthly things that give me pure happiness and calm me. :)

"my dear friend"

day 1... 24 months to go. no more late night texts. no more pop rock moments. or hit in the heads. or even chasing you around with the camera.never thought we would of became as close as we did. i'll miss you best friend. hugs.. and more hugs...and even more hugs to you.

Friends

so basically this is for all th YSA's i hang out with. they are just freaking amazing and just basically awesome people. they are a blessing in my life. i thank heavenly father for them... with all my heart. :) couldn't have chose better people to spend my life with. To share the good and the bad. Whether it's a simple kick back at someone's home watching a movie...scripture study...or a cereal party, dancing and singing our butts off. It's always just the greatest times. Things i'll never forget and try not to take for granted. All of you put a huge SMILE on my face and in my heart. LOVE YOU ALL!

Needed Time

So although i still find a lot to smile about, and i still can think of things to smile for. I can't bring myself to smile for them. If that makes any sense. Today is just one of those days where I'm going to hide my smile away from the world. So though I am grateful for the past couple of days that have been pretty great, I am so happy to be home. Where i think is where I'm going to stay for awhile. I'm in need of just me time, of reevaluating my life. And what I'm going to do with it. How I'm going to get by In this hectic world. These are the things that have been on my mind lately but what i seem to have been pushing aside. Maybe for the fact I'm afraid to move on, or just I'm not sure what to do. I used to pray about it all the time. I never felt as if i got an answer so i just gave up on that one. But i think it's time to keep praying about it. I'm getting older and so far I don't think I've accomplished that much. So this is definitely much needed time i need to take for myself to figure things out.
-A scripture i read recently. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress; My God; in him will I trust. -Psalms 91:2

New Look On Things

ohhhh jeeezz these past couple of days have been quite well. Starting from the middle of last week things have just been pretty great. i think im pretty much out of my stooper i was in. And it feels absolutely amazing. I freakin love all my friends. I love hanging out with them. I thank them for all the good times, laughs, and smiles. And i hope the good times continue to come. :) Been finding a lot to smile about lately. "Begin each day with a grateful heart."