so today i woke up feeling not so horrible. it was a nice feeling. so through my day i went off of that great feeling. finally no feelings of anger or sadness or frustration. it was an amazing relief. i went to FHE today in such a great mood.i was energetic. actually interacting with people, laughing and the whole shabang, without feeling as if i was faking it. i almost got down here and there. and possibly towards the end i did. but when i left and made that drive home. i popped in my church cd. it really helped. thats what i had hoped it would do. i dint want to get to far back into that state of mind again. so once again im doing okay. im in a slow steady process of rebuilding my faith. i pretty high hopes. its about time i learn to do this on my own. i need to learn how to be strong on my own without depending on someone to pick up the slack.not saying its a bad thing. just i need to learn not to not rely completely on someone else, to not become dependent on them. i know i can do this, there may be times where i may fall. but as long as i believe in god and his love for me, i will be okay. this is only the beginning of my journey. and as long as i do what i need to i will always have the spirit to be with me. to protect and guide me. i love my savior and i thank you for every one of my many blessing you gave me. i can do this.. and i will be strong. Always remembering you are greatest when you walk with god. i will have the patience to work through my afflictions.
But that ye have patience, and bear with those afflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions.-Alma 34:40-41
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